


You Trust Me, Right?

by glowworm888



Category: South Park
Genre: Death, Denial, Fluff and Angst, Grief/Mourning, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-27
Updated: 2018-11-27
Packaged: 2019-08-30 04:06:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16757359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glowworm888/pseuds/glowworm888
Summary: Butters goes into a state of shock and denial upon seeing Kenny on his death bed





	You Trust Me, Right?

When Butters got the call from his mom, it seemed too surreal. His emotions didn't even have the ability to react until he got in his car and started driving towards the hospital. That's when the realization hit that his boyfriend wasn't going to make it through the night. 

He was going to try and be stable when he went in to visit, but the minute he saw Kenny's sallow face and weak smile, he broke down. 

"Hey, Buttercup, Angel, it's alright," Kenny said hopefully, "look at me, I'm still alive and kicking. If you think I look bad, you should see the semi truck that hit me" 

Butters wanted to laugh, but he couldn't. His mom told him over the phone that once Kenny fell asleep, he probably wouldn't wake up. It was obvious he wasn't doing well. His breathing was uncontrollably shaky, and his entire body was damaged beyond natural repair. 

Had Kenny's arm not been shattered, he would've ran his hand through his boyfriend's hair. It calmed Butters down when nothing else wouldn't. But the best he could do was blow a puff of air on to the smaller boy's face, causing his hair to flutter upwards for a moment.

"Kenny I don't want you to pretend that you're alright because you know you're not; I know you're not. Tomorrow when you wake up in heaven, everything will be perfect for you. But for me, when I wake up I'll never have you again" he choked out. He crawled on the bed beside Kenny as best he could without hurting him and put an arm around him. 

"Baby Boy, when you wake up, this will all just seem like a bad dream" Kenny said, gritting his teeth when Butters accidentally elbowed him in his swollen ribcage.

"But it won't be over!" Butters wailed, not even attempting to be strong. He completely lost it, letting grief take over. Kenny wasn't even gone yet, and he couldn't handle the circumstances. 

"It'll all be okay in the morning Butters" Kenny said weakly. 

Butters shook his head, hot tears rolling off his cheeks and down his neck. 

"Please don't fall asleep Kenny! Please just stay awake so you don't have to leave me" Butters screamed, having no regard that he was in a hospital. Kenny being too injured to  move, felt trapped and angry he couldn't help his boyfriend handle the situation. 

"The sooner you let me fall asleep, the sooner this will be over" Kenny whispered, trying to calm down his screaming boyfriend. But Butters was having none of it, and latched onto Kenny. Of all his injuries, watching Butters grieve like this hurt the most. 

"Butters please, calm down and make this easy" 

Butters shook his head wildly, refusing to calm down. 

Kenny swallowed the pain and raised his left arm enough to wrap it around Butters, who was gripping on so tightly to Kenny, it was only worsening his pain. 

"Please don't leave!" He screamed into Kenny's side. 

"Butters please, can you listen to me?" He said firmly, trying to quiet the smaller boy. It took a minute, but Butters' sobs slowly became pained whimpers. 

"Thank you Baby. I need you to trust me when I tell you this. You trust me, right?" 

Butters nodded his head, his eyes still puffy from crying. 

"I need you to let me fall asleep, okay? I'm in so much pain, and I can't stand it. You need to let that happen, alright?" 

Kenny gave Butters small rubs on his arm. It was the only affection he could physically give him. But he started wailing again.

"Butters! Butters please!" 

"Kenny I can't! Your pain will be gone instantly, but mine never will! Please don't leave me!" He sobbed, the salt from his tears stinging at the open cuts on Kenny's arm. 

"Baby, hear me out. Trust me, as soon as you wake up in the morning, both our pain will be gone" Kenny sighed. His heart was shattering from watching his boyfriend deal with his death like this. 

How do I make him understand? 

"I really need you to trust me Buttercup. Please, please trust me. This will seem so blurry to you tomorrow that you won't even remember" 

Butters sat up, still sitting next to Kenny. 

"No it fucking won't be! You can't just tell me I'm going to move on over night! That's bullshit! I'm not going to get over you! I'll be heartbroken for years, and I probably won't even leave the house for several days, and at your funeral I'll be the one refusing to let go of your headstone while everyone else is leaving! I'll wear your hoodie constantly until I get so hurt just by looking at it, that I throw it in my closet because I won't be able to stand looking at it! I'll shut down for months and no one will be able to reason with me! So don't you dare say that none of this will matter in the morning!" 

Kenny was taken aback by Butters'outburst, but let it go. The boy was going through heartbreak the way no human should. 

"You've really gotta trust me Butters. I wouldn't tell you anything that wasn't one hundred percent the truth" 

Butters still looked angry. No, not angry. He looked hurt. But Kenny remained calm, for the sake of his boyfriend. 

"Buttercup, you've gotta let me fall asleep. I'm hurting so bad..." He sighed weakly. Butters lay back down next to him, and put his own arm around Kenny. 

"Can I be with you while you sleep?" He whimpered, giving up fighting the inevitable. 

"Wouldn't have it any other way" Kenny whispered, smiling. Almost immediately, his eyes began to close. He felt bad leaving Butters in this condition, but there was nothing he could do except let his Buttercup feel the pain of losing him. There was nothing left for him to do. But there was still one thing he had to say.

"I love you" He choked out, his eyes opening enough to see Butters' eyes look up to meet his own.

"I love you too" 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The first thing Butters did when he woke up was check his phone, just like he did every morning. He scrolled through Instagram, double-tapping on a few pictures from his friends. He combed his hair to get the knots out and brushed his teeth. 

When he walked downstairs, his parents were already on their way out the door. 

"Have a good day, alright Kiddo" His mom asked, giving him a one armed hug. 

"I'll sure try" he replied, grabbing his keys off the table. He hurried out, scraped the frost off his windshield, and drive himself to school. He turned on the radio to hear the ending of a song that he wasn't particularly fond of, but didn't change it just because he didn't have the energy. 

When he walked into school, he stood in the commons, feeling dazed for a moment, but then started wandering towards his first hour class. One his way, he caught sight of an orange hooded boy trying to catch up with him in his peripheral vision. 

"Oh, hey Ken" he said, rubbing his eyes. He wasn't sure why he felt confused to see Kenny for a moment, but he shook it off. 

"Hey Baby Boy. How was your morning?" 

Kenny slid his fingers between Butters' and continued to walk towards his class. 

"It was fine. I just had this really haunting dream" he replied, giving Kenny's hand a squeeze. 

"Oh yeah? Well why don't you tell me about it"


End file.
